Hope you guys have had a good week, even in this new way of living with self isolation.
This week has been very … different I guess is the word I should use.
Went to work on Monday and there was barely anyone on the streets but enough people for it to seem somewhat normal. Then by 8pm that night they announced a lockdown, which meant everyone had no business being outside unless they were working or shopping for essentials.
Through Tuesday to Thursday it was like a very early Sunday morning, all day, when I was making my way to and from work. It was just so … silent.
For the past two weeks there has been a thought that has been repeating itself again and again
“Stay inside and spend time with me”.
I knew this had to be God telling me to get to know Him a bit better but what all I was thinking was “I got bills to pay. I can spend time with you in two weeks when I have those five days off. It’s not like I’m not praying. I’m still spending time with you, it’s just somewhat limited”.
But those words stayed so heavy on my heart in week one. It’s not that I didn’t want to spend time with God I was just afraid and wasn’t really putting my faith in God, so I delayed my time off.
By week two I kept seeing the same thing every single day everywhere. Instagram, Twitter, I heard someone at work say it, heck even a friend said it to me, and that phrase was
“this would be a great time to stay home, look inwardly and deal with what we haven’t dealt with yet”.
And if that wasn’t enough I saw this scripture more often than any scripture in a space of 5 days!
Go into your house, my people, and shut the door behind you. Hide yourselves for a little while until God’s anger is over
Isiah 26:20 (GNB)
That’s when I knew that God had something he wanted me to deal with, things that if it wasn’t this silent I probably wouldn’t be able to sit down and deal with because I was working or too busy being a busybody.
And with all that, still I was thinking “in just two weeks God and I’ll be free for a good amount of days at a time. I’ll keep that free for just you and me”.
But God wanted to spend time with me now. He didn’t want to delay on fixing the things I needed to deal with, He wanted me to deal with those things now. And that’s when I was reminded of a verse, a verse that I actually keep close to me when I feel like I can’t hear God.
After the earthquake, there was a fire – but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire, there was a soft whisper of a voice.
1 Kings 19:12 (GNB)
It was like a reminder that sometimes silence is a good thing. Sometimes we can hear God even better when our lives become less busy and everything is quiet. It was also like He was saying “your life is wayyy too busy for you to really listen what I have to say to you right now, take a time out”.
I did in the end, but instead of doing it out of obedience, I did it out of not having much of a choice.
The reason I didn’t want to was because I was afraid. I was afraid that I would go into a spiral and lose my mind from being home alone, all by myself!
“But God I don’t want that life for me. I still want to interact with people, I want to walk outside with my headphones listening to my music really loud and I actually want to take the bus, it’s nice not having people on it, it’s weird but it’s nice.”
So before I called work I had a little cry because I know lonely, and that is not something I want trying to befriend me, especially not now of all times lol. After building the courage to call work, I thought the best thing to do was to pray, try to find peace in God for whatever it is that was worrying me so much so that being alone was the scariest thing to me at this moment.
I prayed, sat down and cried out to God in my living room “God I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to be by myself” and that’s when I heard the whisper
But you are not alone. I am with you
In the silence. Whilst everyone was inside doing whatever it is they were doing, whilst all was silent, God’s whisper was so loud in my heart.
I am with you
Repeating in my heart, repeating in my mind, continuously. I wasn’t alone. I was never truly alone. Physically? Yeah, I was alone no one was here but the Spirit of God is here with me everyday for eternity. And that truly gave me peace. That truly made me feel so much better to be alone.
Instead of moping around the house feeling anxious and alone, I felt peace and excitement! I was excited to be home alone! I get to spend time with God whenever I want, without feeling as if my time with God is limited because I have to go shopping or to work. I literally now have all the time in the world to sit and focus on all things God related!
That’s how we all should be feeling and what we should be doing. We are in times of silence and what better time to work on our relationship with God when we have nothing else to do for the next few weeks?
So I encourage you, when you are feeling weak during this time
I look up to the mountains; does my strength come from mountains? No, my strength come from GOD, who created the heaven and earth and mountains
Psalms 121:1-2 (MSG)
When you are worried or anxious
Do not be anxious about anything but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and mind in Jesus Christ.
Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV)
And when you are feeling afraid of lonely like I was
Don’t be afraid – I am with you! I am your GOD. Let nothing terrify you!
Isaiah 41:10 (GNB)
Coronavirus is putting a lot of fear and anxiety within people right now and we have a God who can give us peace that will transcend all those fears and anxieties. It’s time we put our full trust in Him and look to Him for peace.
Stay blessed and stay safe
That’s all she wrote …