‘Sup you lot!
This week was Mental Health Awareness Week, so I thought I’d speak on getting to a place where you can be open with your feelings. Not just with people, but with God and yourself.
I wanted to write this post for people who are sensitive like me, people who feel like their sensitivity is a major weakness that they keep their emotions to themselves, too afraid of being called too sensitive that they hide a lot of themselves.
I wrote it to uplift those who have been branded as too sensitive, so that they can see the positives in their sensitivity because we all know that holding in our emotions can be so detrimental to ourselves, which is not good for our mental health at all.
So I hope you can gain confidence in this post by seeing the positives and know that God is a God of all things, including sensitivity.
Last week, I started to feel a little bit low and I wasn’t really sure as to what it was that got me down.
Now for me, unfortunately, I haven’t been able to be completely open regarding my feelings with myself and sometimes others, which people may find weird because I’m also the most open person. I’m an oddball I guess.
When I was growing up I was super sensitive, I’m still sensitive today just not as much, and people used to always think and see me as the ‘sensitive one’. I was called a crybaby and too soft and this stuck with me and continued to play around in my head.
One day when I was 14 years ago, during my depression, I was in my music class and one of the boys in my class said something, I don’t remember what exactly, and one of my friends at the time replied with “don’t say that you’ll just make her cry again” and everyone, including my friend, started laughing.
I was so embarrassed but I held everything together and decided to go home early, without waiting for my friends. As I got off the bus I let it all out and cried as I walked home, using the alleyways so I didn’t bump into anyone. I started praying to God “why didn’t you make me this way? I don’t understand, why didn’t you make me strong? Why did you make me weak?”
When I finally got home, no one was home so I went straight into my bedroom, changed into my pyjamas, closed the blinds, got into bed and cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. Once I had stopped crying I made a vow to myself that I will never cry again.
Ever since then I have had trouble with actually knowing how I feel and managing my feelings. Sometimes we make promises with ourselves that are detrimental to growing our relationship with God. These promises put a barrier in between us and God because they’re not from God. Some people know them as unholy covenants or unholy promises.
I know that sometimes it’s hard to be open, trust me, but sometimes in order for us to be better, in order for God to help us overcome thing and be better, we have to let our guard down and be vulnerable.
God made me to have feelings, and yes being sensitive can be a negative but it can also be a positive.
I’ve googled and found many positives of being highly sensitive. Here are my top 3 for you:
1. You’re highly considerate.
2. You have high levels of empathy and you’re deeply moved by other people’s emotions.
3. You experience positive emotions more deeply.
Being sensitive is not a bad thing. You don’t need to fight your feelings, you don’t have hide your emotions away. It’s ok to admit you’re not ok. It’s ok to have feelings. It’s ok to feel down and out, and not know why. It’s ok to cry. It’s ok.
I had to say that to myself the other week. I’m so adamant that I don’t have to cry and I’m ok, but all I’m doing is putting a big mask and hiding myself from God who’s probably looking down at me like “you’re clearly not ok and you know that I know this. So come to me and lay it at my feet.”
Come to me, all who labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
– Matthew 11:28 (ESV)
I had to admit to myself that I was not ok, cry it out and pray to God about what I was feeling in that moment.
I know it’s ok to cry because even Jesus cried.
Jesus, the Son of God, who has healed many, who was a great leader, also cried. Feelings come from God. If we didn’t have feelings we would be emotionless robots, which is not from God, which would mean we were not made in his image.
If you need to cry out to God, then do it! He will hear you.
The righteous call to God and he listens; he rescues them from their troubles.
Instead of making unholy promises that will create a barrier with God we should cry out to him, in our most deepest, darkest and saddest times. He is listening always.
It’s ok to have raw prayers with God when you’re literally in bits and you’re just asking why. The same way you can be honest with friends, is how you should be honest with God in all areas.
Moses prayed earnestly to the Lord and said “What can I do with these people? They are almost ready to stone me?”
Exodus 17:4 (GNB)
In all his frustration Moses cried out to God. It’s ok to speak to God through all the frustration you’re feeling.
We know God has feelings. God showed love, anger, disappointment, compassion, joy, just to name a few. So don’t condemn yourself if you’re ‘too sensitive’, see the positives in it.
Those of us who are strong and able in the faith need to step in and lend a hand to those who falter, and not just do what is most convenient for us. Strength is for service, not status. Each one of us needs to look after the good of the people around us, asking ourselves, “How can I help?”
Romans 15:1-2 (MSG)
Take this passage and apply it with your high levels of empathy. Your sensitive can be more of a strength than you know.
I hope you’ve been able to find some sort of confidence boost within this post.
Remember always be open. Don’t let anyone say that you’re too sensitive without remembering the positives that come from being highly sensitive. Remember it’s ok to cry, it’s ok to admit that you’re not ok.
God is listening and he’s always around, it’s up to you as to how open and vulnerable you want to be towards Him.
Stay blessed, stay safe
That’s all she wrote …